Getting Started

Perhaps you are just starting to think about private high school for your middle schooler. Or maybe you have started the process of choosing the right private school and had some questions about how to proceed. These five 'must haves' will hopefully help you focus on the things which are truly important when it comes to choosing a private school.

1. The best fit

Always number one on my list is the fit. Fit trumps everything else simply because the fit is all about how your child and the school mesh. If the fit and the school are not in synch, your child will be unhappy. Keep this in mind as you visit schools on your short list. Your child will know instinctively whether or not she likes the school.

Now, having pointed out how important fit is, it makes good sense to organize the visits so that she likes all the schools on your short list. How do you do that? The most efficient way is to hire an educational consultant who will identify schools which will be a good fit. That is what an educational consultant does. Consultants take the time to get to know you and your child. They know their schools too. Accordingly, the list of schools which a consultant presents you will be on target. Any or all of the schools will potentially be a good fit. One will be the best fit. Visiting schools on a list of schools carefully selected with

Actually, there are many more things to know about private schools than the four items I have chosen. But let's get you started with these. They are the ones I consider most important.

For most of us, the idea of sending your child to private school begins with that nagging feeling that she's very bright and needs the very best kind of schooling possible. She needs an enriched academic curriculum. She needs time to explore subjects that interest her. She needs an athletics program with lots of options. She wants to be on the stage. These wishes and desires on her part are not always easily fulfilled in a public school setting. As a result, you start exploring your private school options. That leads you to individual private school websites and resources like this site. And it also raises many questions. So, the four points I will expand on below affirm what you probably already knew anyway.

You cannot rank private schools.

As you explore schools online, you quickly realize there is no way to rank schools. It is perfectly normal to want to send your child to the best school possible. But how can you identify that school if there is no ranking system? First, let's deal with the reality of private schools and ranking. They cannot be ranked. Why? Because they are unique. We have approximately 400 boarding schools in the U.S. Each one is different. Not better. Not worse. Simply different from all the

It is a scenario that plays out more often than you might think. You have been looking at your child's high school with much trepidation. A couple of concerns keep bubbling to the surface of your thinking. For one thing, the school is enormous. While the students get a relatively good education, according to the statistics you have seen, you still have that persistent, nagging feeling that your child deserves more. Her school offers about a dozen AP courses. There are still some clubs and other extracurricular activities available. The sports program seems to focus on the football and basketball teams. The other factor influencing you to decide that you both work. Frequent business travel has become a regular feature of your life, and it looks like it will continue for many years. The bottom line is that you want your child to attend private school because it will solve some of these problems and correct some of her current public education deficiencies. But how are you going to convince her to go along with you? Let's look at some strategies and approaches that work.

This short video illustrates some of the reasons why parents consider sending their children to private schools.

Don't dictate what is going to happen.

The quickest way to turn your child against any idea, no matter how rational and well-intentioned that idea may be, is to dictate. Telling her that she

We all have so many things on our minds and so much to do every day. So when it comes to undertaking a major project such as finding the right private school for your child, anything which will help you zero in on what needs to be done is helpful. I have always found mnemonics useful. With that in mind, you can use this simple mnemonic to help you organize your search for a private school for your child.

In this short clip, Jennifer Schroeder shares her experiences choosing a private school.

From start to finish you will probably invest up to 125 hours in this process if you are looking at boarding schools. About 50 hours if you are looking at day schools. Perhaps 25 hours if you are investigating primary and preschools. It's a lot of work with a lot of deadlines to fit into your busy schedule. But if you will scope out the various tasks you have to do and work through them step by step, you will get through it.

The most important caution that I or any private school consultant will give you is a very simple one: start the process as far in advance as you possibly can. At least 18 months before the fall of the year you plan for your child to attend her new school. If you are forced to find a school at the

As you begin exploring schools for your child, you begin to realize that you have dozens of options. And they are all a little different. It's rather bewildering looking at all these websites, especially if you have never visited a private school before. They are all so different. How can you ever decide which one is best for your daughter? Start with a very basic strategy, a game plan, if you will. Let's look at what really matters when it comes to choosing a private school for your child.

Your requirements

Start with your requirements. Your requirements trump everything. So have a family discussion. Be relaxed and open-minded because your requirements as a parent will be different from your daughter's. You are thinking about the best educational experience. She's thinking about her life and her friends and the reality that she will have a whole new situation to deal with. That's scary for a young person. But you can make it an adventure and get her to buy into going to private school if you are patient, informative, and, above all, a listener. Dictating your child will probably get you nowhere in a hurry.

So, what's really important? Ponder these questions and then develop some answers after having that family discussion.

• Are you looking for a traditional college prep school experience or something else?
• Is your religion a major determining factor?
• What about sports? Arts programs? Extracurricular activities?

What about a school such as Midland School in